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A woman is going viral for sharing the roller coaster she went on after finding out the man she was dating was married.
In a viral five-part series, @mummaemmy_ begins by saying she met the man on TikTok after they started following each other and liking each other’s posts. She thought he was attractive and liked that they were following each other, but one day, out of the blue, she couldn’t find his account.
She messaged a friend to investigate whether his account was still active and found that it was, meaning he had blocked her. The creator wonders what she could’ve done to be blocked, as they hadn’t even had a conversation. Then, a month later, his account reappears, and he slides into her direct messages.
This is where it starts
The TikToker says they were bantering when she finally confronted him, asking why he had blocked her.
“Oh, I was hoping you weren’t gonna bring that up,” she recalls him saying. She says he told her that he didn’t actually block her; he deactivated his account and when he reactivated it, some accounts were blocked, including those belonging to colleagues, while others were not.
The woman accepts this, and their conversation exits the TikTok app and moves to WhatsApp. She says he told him his great uncle had just passed away and his grandfather had passed when he had deactivated his TikTok. She offered her sympathy, and after more talking, he asked her on a date.
He flew out to her state to take her on the date, and she had a great time, but she wondered how a relationship would work. Not only is he long-distance, he’s older, has children, and @mummaemmy_ has her own child to take care of. However, he convinced her it could work because his company would fly him out to work in her state every other week. They then began talking about what their relationship would look like in the long term, like what it would be like if they had children. She notes that this was “over, like, a course of time,” and not early in the relationship.
She adds, “Before I met this person, I actually saw a psychic. [The] psychic basically described him, down to what he does for work, tattoos on his body, how many children he had, down to the car he was driving.” It seems that when she met him, she remembered what the psychic said and thought their relationship was written in the stars.
‘My gut is like alarm bells’
The ideal soon slipped after the couple was touring the city, and the man received a phone call about his parents having been in a car accident. He says he needs to go back to his hotel room so the TikToker gives him space and goes to her own. After she realizes she hasn’t heard from him in an hour, she starts to panic, at first thinking he was buying an illicit substance to use on her. They began messaging and his story wasn’t adding up, but he calmed her down with a phone call and they went on their planned date.
The TikToker says she’s a very spiritual person and she believes in angel numbers, which she saw a lot during her encounters with the man. There was even one with shared significance to them that showed up several times on the day of the alleged car accident.
After that, the man went home and the TikToker felt an “energy shift.” After a week, he’s low-contact and telling her he can’t be in a relationship because he has too much going on with his kids and the deaths in his family.
She accepts this as she wasn’t sure long-distance would work anyway. Then, three months later, she received a direct message from a woman asking if the TikToker knew her husband.
The truth comes to light
They exchange phone numbers, and the wife calls the TikToker. The TikToker explains that the man told her he was divorced. The wife says they’ve been separated for three years but they’ve been trying to make it work on-and-off.
Despite trying to make things work, the wife tells the TikToker that she and her husband lived in separate homes—which is at least one thing he didn’t lie about. The TikToker then becomes curious about how the wife found her. The woman says that around the time her husband initially followed the TikToker, he had gone back to her and was trying to make things work. The wife pulled up the TikToker’s profile and confronted her husband about it, and he claimed not to know of or speak with the TikToker. The wife said if he was serious about being with her, he needed to block the TikToker, so he did.
More to the story
The husband broke up with the wife on New Year’s Eve. Around Jan. 6, he unblocked the TikToker and began conversing with her. His wife says that he had gotten back together with an ex-girlfriend in his city at the same time.
She says she knew about her husband flip-flopping between her and the ex-girlfriend, prompting the TikToker to wonder why the wife is still entertaining him. She tells the woman that, though it must be hard to leave him because they have three kids and were high school sweethearts who met at 15, she should let him go. That’s when the wife drops another bomb: They met at 19 or 20. “I was like, why would you lie about that?” the TikToker questions.
The wife says her husband wasn’t seeing her while he was seeing the TikToker, but he was seeing his ex-girlfriend. Around the time he flew to her city, he broke up with the ex. She believes that the phone call he received about his parents’ car accident was really the ex-girlfriend calling him out.
More lies are revealed
She believes this because the wife told her his parents were never in a car accident. The wife then reveals that her husband’s great uncle didn’t pass because he has no extended family and both of his grandfathers had already been gone for about 10 years. Meanwhile, on the day of the supposed funeral, he was texting the TikToker and thanking her for her support.
The lies didn’t stop there.
The TikToker continued interrogating the wife and found that, while he told the truth about getting into a motorcycle accident shortly after the birth of their third child, he lied about flatlining and needing two years of physical therapy to learn to walk again. He also lied about Foot Locker buying out one of his businesses and making the cookies for another of his businesses.
On top of that, while he told the TikToker that the marriage had just fizzled out after his accident and there was no infidelity because he’s “a very loyal man,” his wife says he cheated on her. The TikToker says she figured there was someone else when he ended things with her, so she asked point-blank if he was still married or had a girlfriend and he denied it.
He also used two different names. His wife used the English pronunciation of his name, while the TikToker knew the cultural pronunciation.
How did he manage to get away with this?
The two women agree he is good-looking, charming, charismatic, a smooth-talker, calm, and soothing.
“It was really hard not to believe him,” the TikToker says. She adds that with him saying things like he wants her to meet his parents and how quickly he came up with an excuse for blocking her, she never expected that he was still married. “As soon as he flashes that smile, … it’s like a spell’s been put on you,” she says. “It’s ridiculous.”
‘Who the F do you think you are?’
She says the wife asked if she could reveal to the husband that they had spoken and that the TikToker was the one who reached out. She wanted to lie about who reached out because she had contacted her husband’s affair partners before and he threatened legal action if she did it again. The TikToker was slightly uncomfortable with this but ultimately agreed. The wife later called her and said her husband was mad that they had spoken. He called the TikToker, which she missed, and then sent her an angry TikTok message asking, “How dare you contact my wife?”
She says he called her behavior “disgusting” and “slanderous” and that he threatened to take legal action if she continued. He then sent a similar statement via iMessage. The TikToker found this laughable and told him she was within her rights to privately share her experience with someone. She called his repeated messages manipulative and harassing and requested that he no longer contact her.
‘It just became really draining for me’
The TikToker says she had been regularly talking with the wife since their first call. The wife would call every day around three times a day to talk about her husband and the lies he told the TikToker. The TikToker didn’t mind this at first, but it became draining for her. She told the wife that she had to take a step back from the situation to protect her peace but she hopes the woman leaves him for good and finds someone who values her and will model what a healthy relationship looks like for her children.
Then, another woman gets involved
The TikToker says a woman direct messaged her and asked for details about the man to confirm his identity. Once they knew they were talking about the same man, they called each other. The woman had not dated him, but was in a friend group with him. He approached her after she broke things off with her husband and used the same lie about deaths in the family. She said she felt like she was being used like a pawn in the husband and wife’s toxic game of getting back at each other, which is how the TikToker felt. The woman also noted that she was a single mother and the man had pursued other single mothers on TikTok, making the TikToker believe this was a habit for him.
LinkedIn lurking goes wrong
The same day she conversed with this woman, the TikToker Googled the man, which was something he said she could do while they were dating because he had “nothing to hide.” At the time, the top result was his LinkedIn profile, and it still was when the TikToker went to check after they broke up. However, something caught her off guard. When she checked the profile, he still worked for the same company, but he was now working in her city.
She recalled that his wife told her he would be working in her city for six, nine, or 12 months. Fortunately, she believes they won’t bump into each other because she never goes out. But if they do, “He’s gonna be running the other way, like, tail between his legs.”
‘I guess the psychic forgot to tell you he was married…’
In the comments section, viewers said there were red flags she shouldn’t have ignored and that she should learn to trust her intuition, which is what the constant appearance of angel numbers could have signified. Others said experiences like hers are why they don’t date, especially people they meet on TikTok. Meanwhile, some questioned the psychic’s powers of divination.
One said, “The psychic told you everything but failed to mention he was married? That’s the MAIN piece. That’s the FIRST thing that draws the line. How evil of the psychic to have missed the most important fact. That could’ve prevented all of this.”
The creator responded, “Psychics pick up on energies, they interpret what’s being presented to them in that moment. It’s still up to the person receiving the message to use their own discretion and intuition. No psychic is all-knowing.”
@mummaemmy_ Story time #storytime #dating #fail #girlproblems #singlelife #fyp #viral #true #story #truestory #thisismylife ♬ original sound – mummaemmy_
What should I do if I find out I’m the ‘other woman’?
If you were unknowingly involved in an affair, you may want to tell the partner who has been cheated on that their partner is unfaithful. However, Business Insider notes that this is not your responsibility.
In fact, it is probably best not to say anything at all. Often, the desire to warn the other partner comes from jealousy or anger, not from doing the right thing. If you want to do what’s right, you can confront the cheater, tell them to inform their partner, and dump them. They may not tell their partner about the cheating, but that’s not your business. It may be frustrating to see the person never having to take accountability for their actions, but again, that feeling may be rooted in anger or jealousy. Perhaps you are upset that, in doing the right thing, you had to end your relationship while the other one is allowed to continue. Instead of holding on to that, try to move on.
What if I find out I’m the other woman and I don’t want to do the right thing?
They say, “Don’t let your girlfriend stop you from finding your wife,” implying infidelity is OK because it may lead to a relationship that is seemingly more committed and longer lasting. However, the truth is, if you’re the other woman, a man is unlikely to leave his wife or girlfriend for you.
Psychotherapist and relationship expert Dr. Marni states, “The most recent statistics show that only 3 to 5% of married men who have affairs go on to divorce their wife and marry their mistress, and the current divorce rate for second marriages is thought to be around 60%.”
So, if you’re content with being a side-piece indefinitely, feel free to continue a relationship after discovering you’re the affair partner. However, if you don’t want to be the other woman forever but you’re struggling to leave your partner, consider reading Dr. Marni’s 10 harsh truths about being an affair partner to give yourself a wake-up call and the willpower to leave.
The Mary Sue reached out to @mummaemmy_ via TikTok comment and direct message.
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