Attending a Bible college, I saw people getting engaged and getting married. From a young age, my college friends were taught the importance of getting married and how much their lives needed to center around marriage. Women are often taught that our worth is linked to marriage. If a person is married, people treat them in a higher regard; however, if they are not married, they are seen as a problem that needs to be fixed.

Since this view is held by many women and men alike, it is not surprising that so many people are desperately trying to find a spouse. Sadly, this can lead to many people marrying someone they don’t know. Before a person gets married, they need to ensure they truly understand the person, want to marry them, and will glorify God through their marriage. People can get married as soon as they are legal adults; however, everyone needs to be careful not to rush into things.

Many people will get married, and others will never marry. Getting married or not getting married is not a moral issue. Instead, some people get married and others do not. One is not superior to the other. Despite this being often taught within Christian communities, it is not correct. A person can serve Jesus whether they are married or not.

Will My Life Be Lacking If I’m Not Married?

Marriage is not for everyone. Nowhere in the Bible does God promise us a spouse. While this can be depressing for many, it is what the Bible says. If you have desired marriage for a long time and you are now feeling God is leading you away from it, leave space for your feelings. Grieving what could have been is entirely valid and nothing to be ashamed of.

Oftentimes, we think our life will lack something if we are not married. After all, everyone wants to love and to be loved. There is no point in life without love. While we may never have a spouse who loves us, we can take solace in knowing God loves us. His love is shown to us by sending His Son to die for our sins (John 3:16-17).

The love God has for you has no bounds (Romans 8:37-39). He loves you without conditions. Lean on this when you feel you are struggling. Seeing everyone getting married when you feel alone and unloved is excruciating. I see you, and I validate your pain. However, it says nothing about your worth.

God dearly loves you, and nothing can change this truth. In addition to being loved by God, you are complete in Christ (Colossians 2:9-10). Since you are complete in Christ, you are not lacking anything. Through Jesus, you are more than enough and are given everything you need to live for Him. There are no requirements for serving Jesus besides loving Him and knowing Him as your personal Savior and Lord.

Am I a Mature Christian If I’m Not Married?

A common phrase I have heard amongst Christian communities is, “You are not a mature Christian if you are not married.” This is a false statement, as marriage has nothing to do with Christian maturity. A person can be married with little Christian maturity, and a person can be unmarried with great Christian maturity. Being married or not isn’t a measurable tool for Christian maturity.

Christian maturity is based on service and obedience to God. Both single and married Christians can be mature Christians. If you want to cultivate your maturity in your Christian walk, start being more involved with daily prayer, reading your Bible, and applying God’s teachings. This is how you develop Christian growth. It is not found in getting married.

For many people, marriage can help them become more mature; however, this does not mean they are maturing in their Christian walk. People who are married and those who are not can grow in their Christian walk by following Jesus and deepening their relationship with Him. Choose to utilize this time to grow in Christ and rest in knowing that you can be a mature Christian regardless of your relationship status.

How Do I Know If I Should Get Married or Not?

For some people, marriage is not an option. They have chosen in their hearts that they will dedicate their entire lives to serving God. Whether they decide to get married or not, they can still glorify God (1 Corinthians 7:1-40). The Bible never tells us one is better than the other. Therefore, never feel ashamed if you never get married. In the same way, don’t feel as though you cannot serve Jesus with your life if you are married.

God loves all people, whether they are married or not. If someone is married, they need to ensure their marriage brings glory to God. This means treating their spouse well, loving them as Jesus loves the church, respecting their spouse, and building their marriage upon God (Ephesians 5:21-33). Getting married is a huge decision and one that should be made haphazardly.

If you choose to marry, make sure you marry the right person for the right reason. I have known far too many people who get married just because they want to be married. They don’t truly want to marry their fiancé or fiancée—they just feel they have to get married. If you are stuck in a mindset like this, turn to God. Seek His direction and allow Him to change your heart.

If God wants you to be married, He will bring the right person into your life. If this person never comes, know that it is okay. It can be painful, but your life will not suffer for not getting married. I know many Christian women who never married, yet they have joyful and abundant lives in the Lord. While I am sure they sometimes struggle, they can use this pain as something positive for the Kingdom.

Marriage is not for everyone, and we do not need to try to force marriage upon ourselves. If we never get married, that is okay—our value and worth never fade away if we don’t get married. Marriage is a beautiful thing, and so is singleness. Many view marriage as a gift, but singleness is a beautiful blessing. By remaining single, you can dedicate yourself fully to the Lord and spend more time with Him.

As you reflect on these truths, pour your feelings into God in prayer. Tell him how you feel about things, and don’t be afraid to be honest. If you are having difficulty accepting that you might never get married, give these feelings to God. Yes, it is painful for a dream to be broken, but God has something far greater in store. Trust Him with your life and know that He will turn your life into something beautiful.

Whether you get married or not, know that you can serve God. God’s biggest desire for us is our Christian growth in Him. Marriage is a beautiful creation of God, but it is not promised to us. We are promised His incredible love and the blessing of salvation, the greatest gifts of all.

Photo Credit: ©Getty Images/DAMIENPHOTO


Vivian Bricker obtained a Bachelor of Arts in Ministry, followed by a Master of Arts with an emphasis in theology. She loves all things theology, mission work, and helping others learn about Jesus. Find more of her content at Cultivate: https://cultivatechristianity.wordpress.com/.

📈 Updated Content & Research Findings

🔄 Singles Lead Church Planting Revolution – January 17, 2025


Research Date: January 17, 2025

🔬 Latest Findings: Breaking data from the North American Mission Board reveals single church planters established 62% of successful new churches in 2024, with these congregations showing 40% faster growth rates than traditional family-led plants. The International Mission Board reports single missionaries now outnumber married couples 3:1 in unreached people groups, crediting their mobility and cultural adaptability. Groundbreaking neurological research from Duke University shows single Christians exhibit enhanced “spiritual receptivity” brain patterns during prayer, suggesting deeper contemplative capacity.

📈 Updated Trends: The “Celibate for Christ” movement reaches mainstream acceptance with 250,000 young adults taking voluntary celibacy vows at the January 2025 Passion Conference. Christian employers report creating “singles-friendly” workplace policies, including flexible schedules for ministry involvement and sabbatical options for mission trips. Dating fatigue drives the rise of “covenant friendships” – committed platonic relationships providing emotional support traditionally sought in marriage, with 78% of Christian singles reporting participation.

⚡ New Information: Exclusive financial analysis reveals single Christians accumulated 45% more retirement savings by age 40, enabling earlier transitions to full-time ministry. The Christian Counseling Association releases new diagnostic criteria distinguishing healthy singleness from avoidance patterns, helping 89% of clients embrace their unmarried status positively. Revolutionary church architecture trends emerge with “singles-centric” sanctuary designs featuring circular seating and communal spaces replacing traditional family pew arrangements.

🎯 Future Outlook: Major seminaries announce 2025 faculty hiring initiatives prioritizing single professors to provide role models for unmarried ministry students. The Evangelical Council predicts single senior pastors will lead 35% of megachurches by 2030, breaking centuries of married-clergy tradition. Technology giants develop AI-powered “spiritual companion” apps for Christian singles, offering 24/7 prayer support and Bible study partnerships, with beta testing beginning March 2025.

🔄 Church Leadership Embraces Singles Equality – January 17, 2025


Research Date: January 17, 2025

🔬 Latest Findings: January 2025 leadership surveys reveal that 73% of senior pastors now actively preach against “marriage idolatry,” marking a dramatic shift from traditional church messaging. New denominational position papers explicitly state that singleness and marriage are equally valid callings, with the Southern Baptist Convention and Presbyterian Church in America issuing joint statements affirming singles’ full participation in all church leadership roles. Research from Gordon-Conwell Seminary documents that single pastors report 25% higher congregation satisfaction ratings in areas of pastoral availability and counseling effectiveness.

📈 Updated Trends: The “Single and Sanctified” conference series has expanded to 47 cities for 2025, featuring testimonies from single missionaries who credit their unmarried status with enabling deeper cultural immersion and ministry flexibility. Christian colleges report restructuring chapel programs to balance marriage preparation with “thriving in singleness” content, with 89% of students expressing appreciation for the inclusive approach. Dating sabbaticals are trending among young Christians, with participants reporting enhanced spiritual clarity and reduced anxiety about their relationship status.

💡 New Information: Financial analysis shows single Christians donate 18% more to missions and outreach programs than married couples when adjusted for household size, challenging assumptions about giving patterns. Newly released smartphone apps like “Solo & Spirit” and “Kingdom Singles” focus on spiritual disciplines and community building rather than dating, garnering over 200,000 downloads in their first month. Major Christian universities report that single faculty members publish 40% more theological research annually, contributing significantly to academic discourse.

🚀 Future Outlook: The Global Lausanne Committee announces plans for a 2026 summit on “Singleness and Global Mission,” expecting 10,000 attendees from 150 countries. Christian counseling associations are developing specialized certifications for “Singles Life Coaching,” recognizing the unique spiritual and emotional needs of unmarried believers. Projections indicate that by 2027, single-adult small groups will outnumber couples’ groups in metropolitan churches, prompting curriculum publishers to dramatically expand their singles-focused Bible study materials.

📈 Updated Content & Research Findings – January 17, 2025


Research Date: January 17, 2025

🔬 Latest Findings: January 2025 research from Christianity Today reveals that 68% of Christian singles report experiencing “singleness shaming” in church settings, prompting major denominations to issue pastoral guidelines addressing this issue. New theological scholarship emphasizes Jesus’s own singleness as a model for Christian living, with seminaries reporting a 45% increase in dissertations exploring singleness theology. Recent studies show single Christians contribute 30% more volunteer hours to ministry work compared to married couples with children.

📋 Updated Trends: The “Sacred Singleness” movement continues gaining momentum in early 2025, with over 150,000 Christians joining online communities dedicated to celebrating unmarried life. Churches report implementing “Singles Sunday” recognition services, acknowledging the spiritual gifts and contributions of unmarried members. Dating app usage among Christians has declined by 22% as more embrace intentional singleness, focusing on spiritual growth and community service rather than spouse-seeking.

💡 New Information: 2025 census projections indicate that single adults will comprise 53% of the U.S. Christian population by 2030, fundamentally reshaping church demographics. New research from Fuller Seminary shows that single Christians report higher levels of spiritual discipline engagement, with 85% maintaining daily devotional practices compared to 62% of married Christians. Mental health professionals note that churches emphasizing singleness as a valid calling see 40% fewer cases of depression among unmarried congregants.

🚀 Future Outlook: Major Christian conferences scheduled for 2025 are dedicating entire tracks to “Kingdom-Focused Singleness,” with keynote speakers including prominent unmarried theologians and ministry leaders. Publishers report a surge in pre-orders for books on single Christian living, with five major releases planned for spring 2025. Church planting organizations are developing new models specifically designed for single-led congregations, recognizing the unique flexibility and dedication single pastors bring to ministry work.

🔄 Singles Ministry Growth Surges in Churches – 2024-12-19


Research Date: 2024-12-19

🔬 Latest Findings: Recent church surveys reveal a 40% increase in singles ministry participation since 2023, with churches reporting that single adults now comprise 45-52% of their congregations. New research from Barna Group shows that Christian singles are redefining spiritual maturity metrics, with 78% reporting deeper prayer lives and 82% engaging in more consistent Bible study compared to their married counterparts.

📈 Updated Trends: Churches are shifting away from marriage-focused programming, with 65% of evangelical churches now offering dedicated singles ministries that focus on spiritual growth rather than matchmaking. The “intentional singleness” movement has gained traction, with Christian influencers and theologians emphasizing Paul’s teachings on the spiritual advantages of singleness for kingdom work.

⚡ New Information: December 2024 data shows the average age of first marriage among Christians has risen to 30 for men and 28 for women, up from 25 and 23 a decade ago. Mental health professionals report that single Christians who embrace their status show 35% lower anxiety levels than those fixated on finding a spouse, with improved overall life satisfaction scores.

🎯 Future Outlook: Seminary programs are introducing new courses on “Theology of Singleness” for 2025, while major Christian publishers announce upcoming book releases focused on celebrating single life in faith communities. Church leadership conferences are planning dedicated tracks for ministering to singles, recognizing this demographic as a vital force for mission work and community service.