These Winter Writing Prompts can be used by children of all ages, with young children drawing a picture while older ones write short stories or a longer, multiple page story.

Check out the list of materials that we use with these printables.

Winter Writing Prompts

In this printable pack, there are so many different winter themed topics to choose from.

Here are just a few of the thirty that you will find in this printable:

• Winter is exciting because…
• Write a story about a snowstorm that brings a town together in a surprising way.
• Describe the perfect day playing in the snow.
• Write about a winter carnival where all the games and rides are made of ice and snow.
• Create a recipe for the ultimate winter treat.
• Image you are in charge of decorating the biggest Christmas tree in the world. How would you decorate it?
• If the power went out during winter, write about how you would stay warm.
• If I were a snowflake, I would…
• What activities do you like to do during winter?

These fun winter themed writing prompts are sure to engage your children and get their creative juices flowing.

These thirty winter prompts are great for morning work, early finishers, creative writing practice, art practice, creative thinking, homework and so much more!

Promises are tricky things.

If they were coins, they’d have two sides: making them and keeping them.

Making them is convenient.

A promise like “I’ll donate what I don’t use” can make accumulating things feel charitable.
A promise like “I’ll organize all this when life slows down” can make procrastination look like patience.
A promise like “I vow to never do that again” can sound like redemption.
A promise like “We’ll take that vacation soon” can buy hope, even if the calendar never changes.
A promise like “I’ll pay later with interest” can open doors that cash can’t.

Yes, making promises is convenient. But keeping them is costly.

The convenience of a promise is balanced by the cost of delivery—or the consequences of disappointment.

Delivery requires effort and sacrifice. It isn’t measured by what we say, but by what we do.

Disappointment erodes trust. When promises pile up without action, the entire coin loses its value.

Ask anyone who’s waited for a call that never came.
Or circled a date on the calendar for a trip that never happened.
Or worse—anyone who stopped believing in themselves because of vows broken to their own soul.

The point isn’t to make more promises. It isn’t even just to keep the ones we make. It’s to learn how to make promises that we can—and truly want to—keep.

Before you make your next promise, ask:

Am I making this promise to avoid conflict?
Do my promises reflect my values—or other people’s expectations?
Is a promise the best way to solve this problem—or to create this result?
Could I create the experience I want without making a promise at all?
And if a promise is truly necessary … am I prepared to pay the price of keeping it?

Anyone can mint promises. Fewer can spend them wisely.

Promises: Wisdom from The Minimalists on Making and Keeping Commitments

By Sophia Lin – Mindfulness & Mental Health Guide

Imagine settling onto a soft cushion on your city balcony as the sun dips low, casting a golden hue over the skyline. A gentle breeze carries the scent of blooming jasmine from a nearby planter, and in your hands rests an open journal, its pages waiting for your thoughts. As you ponder the commitments you’ve made—to yourself, to loved ones, to the life you envision—a quiet realization dawns: promises are more than words; they’re bridges between intention and action. This serene moment of reflection echoes the wisdom from The Minimalists on promises, reminding us that in a world full of distractions, honoring our word is a path to true freedom and peace. With 2025 unfolding, embracing this insight can transform how we navigate relationships, personal growth, and daily choices, leading to a more mindful, meaningful existence.

Promises, as discussed by The Minimalists, hold profound power in shaping our lives. In their thought-provoking piece, T.K. Coleman delves into the duality of promises—easy to make yet costly to keep—and how minimalism encourages us to approach them with intention. This resonates deeply with mindfulness practices, where self-awareness helps us discern which commitments serve our highest good. Backed by insights from Psychology Today on how rituals like journaling build emotional resilience, this guide unpacks The Minimalists’ views on promises, weaves in practical mindfulness strategies, and offers tools to help you cultivate integrity. Whether you’re seeking to simplify your obligations or strengthen bonds, understanding promises through this lens can lead to lasting fulfillment. Let’s explore why these ideas matter and how to apply them today.

The Two Sides of Promises: Insights from The Minimalists

The Minimalists describe promises as tricky coins with two sides: the convenience of making them and the cost of keeping them. Making a promise often feels effortless—a quick vow to donate unused items or organize clutter “when life slows down” can justify holding onto excess. Yet, as Coleman notes, delivery demands effort and sacrifice, measured not by words but by actions. This metaphor highlights how unfulfilled promises erode trust, both in others and ourselves.

In mindfulness, this duality invites us to pause and examine our motivations. Are we promising to avoid conflict or because it aligns with our values? Greater Good Science Center research shows that mindful reflection reduces impulsive decisions, helping us make commitments we can honor. By adopting The Minimalists’ perspective on promises, we learn to prioritize quality over quantity in our words.

Minimalism, at its core, is about stripping away the unnecessary to focus on what adds value—and promises embody this principle. The Minimalists argue that thoughtless promises clutter our lives, much like excess possessions. A vow to “pay later with interest” might open doors but burdens us with debt, while “we’ll take that vacation soon” buys hope without delivery.

This aligns with mindfulness, where we cultivate awareness to live intentionally. Harvard Health studies indicate that minimalism reduces stress by simplifying choices, and applying this to promises means making fewer but more meaningful ones. For instance, instead of overcommitting socially, promise quality time that you can genuinely provide. The Minimalists’ take on promises encourages us to declutter our verbal landscape, creating space for authentic connections.

The Cost of Broken Promises: Emotional and Mental Impacts

Broken promises carry heavy consequences, as The Minimalists point out—disappointment that erodes trust and self-belief. Recall waiting for a call that never comes or a trip that never materializes; these moments chip away at relationships and inner peace. Coleman warns that when promises pile up without action, their value diminishes entirely.

From a mental health viewpoint, this leads to anxiety and resentment. Psychology Today reports that unkept commitments trigger guilt and stress, disrupting emotional balance. Mindfulness helps by fostering self-compassion during reflection—use a dedicated space with an essential oils diffuser to create a calming atmosphere, infusing lavender for relaxation. By understanding The Minimalists’ wisdom on promises, we can mitigate these costs through honest self-assessment.

Making Mindful Promises: A Step-by-Step Guide

The Minimalists advise asking key questions before committing: Is this to avoid conflict? Does it reflect my values? Could I achieve this without a promise? This reflective process is pure mindfulness in action.

Step 1: Pause and breathe—center yourself to evaluate the promise’s necessity.

Step 2: Align with values—ensure it supports your goals, not external expectations.

Step 3: Assess readiness—are you prepared to pay the price of keeping it?

Step 4: Consider alternatives—sometimes action speaks louder than words.

Incorporating a mindfulness journal can track these reflections, turning abstract ideas into tangible habits. As Coleman suggests, wise promises are those we truly want to keep, fostering integrity and simplicity.

How Promises Strengthen Relationships

In relationships, promises build trust when kept, but The Minimalists caution against using them as Band-Aids. A casual “I’ll change” can seem redemptive but fails without follow-through, leading to relational clutter.

Mindfulness enhances this by promoting present-moment awareness during conversations. The Gottman Institute emphasizes that reliable commitments nurture emotional safety. Apply The Minimalists’ insights by making promises that prioritize shared values, like dedicated date nights over vague plans. For deeper connection, diffuse calming oils with an essential oils diffuser during talks—the exact one I use creates a soothing ambiance for honest dialogues.

Promises to Yourself: The Foundation of Self-Integrity

The Minimalists highlight self-promises as crucial—vows broken to our own soul hurt most. Promising to “never do that again” feels empowering, but without action, it breeds self-doubt.

Mindfulness teaches self-kindness here; start small with daily affirmations. WebMD notes that consistent self-commitments boost confidence. Track progress in a mindfulness journal, noting how honoring promises aligns with minimalism’s essence of intentional living. This practice, inspired by The Minimalists on promises, cultivates inner peace.

Integrating The Minimalists’ Wisdom into Daily Life

Bring The Minimalists’ lessons on promises into routine by auditing current commitments. List them, evaluate alignment, and release those that don’t serve you—a minimalist declutter for your word.

Pair with mindfulness exercises: Meditate on a meditation cushion for clarity, the one that supports my daily retreats perfectly. As Coleman advises, focus on promises you can keep wisely, reducing mental load. For more on this, see our post on embracing the art of self-reflection.

Common Myths About Promises Debunked

Myth 1: More promises mean more productivity. The Minimalists counter that quality trumps quantity—overpromising leads to burnout.

Myth 2: Broken promises are forgivable if intentions were good. Reality: Actions define trust, per Psychology Today.

Myth 3: Promises are always necessary for motivation. Often, direct action suffices, simplifying life.

Debunking these with mindfulness reveals how The Minimalists’ view on promises promotes authenticity. Explore nurturing your mental fitness for more myth-busting tips.

The Role of Reflection in Honoring Promises

Reflection is key to The Minimalists’ approach—questioning before promising prevents regret. Mindfulness amplifies this through journaling or meditation.

Dedicate time daily; use a mindfulness journal to log commitments and outcomes. This habit, drawn from Coleman’s questions, ensures promises enhance rather than hinder simplicity. Link to finding calm in everyday moments for reflection techniques.

Books and Resources to Dive Deeper into Promises and Minimalism

Expand your understanding with “Everything That Remains” by The Minimalists—a memoir exploring letting go for meaningful living. The book offers personal stories that complement their promises insights.

For mindfulness integration, “The Mindful Body” provides tools for body-aware commitments. Currently 20% off—grab it for your library. Visit theminimalists.com for more essays.

Seasonal Ties: Renewing Promises in 2025

As 2025 begins, use the new year for promise renewal—minimalist style. Reflect on past commitments during holiday quiet, setting intentional ones for growth.

This seasonal hook aligns with The Minimalists’ philosophy, promoting simplicity amid resolutions. For winter wellness, diffuse seasonal scents with an essential oils diffuser, enhancing reflection sessions.

Overcoming Challenges in Keeping Promises

Challenges like procrastination arise, but The Minimalists suggest starting small. Mindfulness aids by breaking tasks into present-moment steps.

If overwhelmed, meditate on a meditation cushion to regain focus—the exact one I rely on for clarity. This overcomes barriers, turning promises into achieved realities.

The Joy of Fulfilled Promises: Stories and Inspiration

Fulfilled promises bring joy, as seen in The Minimalists’ journeys. One reader shared how decluttering vows led to freedom, echoing Coleman’s message.

In mindfulness, this joy stems from alignment. Share your stories in comments—how have kept promises changed your life? For inspiration, read understanding emotional boundaries.

Promises, as illuminated by The Minimalists, are tools for a simpler, more authentic life. By making intentional commitments and honoring them through mindfulness, we cultivate integrity that radiates outward. As 2025 invites new beginnings, embrace this wisdom to live with purpose, free from the clutter of unkept words. Your journey starts with one mindful promise today.

P.S. Unlock our free mindfulness journal to track your promises and reflections—and start building habits that stick.

Related Posts

• Half Empty The Minimalists
• Embracing the Art of Self-Reflection
• Nurturing Your Mental Fitness
• Finding Calm in Everyday Moments
• Understanding Emotional Boundaries

We don’t realize how often we hold ourselves back by holding on to everything.

Letting go is not giving up. Letting go is surrendering any needless attachments to particular outcomes and situations. Surrender means showing up in your life with the intention to be your best, and to do the best you know how, without expecting life to be ideal. Have goals, have dreams, take purposeful action, and build solid relationships, but detach from what life must look like every step of the way.

The energy of someone aspiring to create something wonderful today, teamed with a healthy balance of surrender, is far more effective than someone determined to create outcomes with a desperate must-have mentality. Surrender brings inner calmness, awareness, and understanding. And lest we forget that our outer lives are a reflection of our inner state of being.

Thus, take a moment to remind yourself of some heavy things most of us attach to long after it’s time to let go, so you can loosen your grip on them as you move forward…

1. The expectation of how things “should” be.

Try to use frustration and inconvenience to motivate you rather than annoy you today. You are in control of the way you look at life. Instead of getting angry, find the lesson. In place of envy, feel admiration. In place of worry, take action. In place of doubt, have faith. Remember that your response is always more powerful than your present circumstance. A small part of your life is decided by completely uncontrollable circumstances, while the vast majority of your life is decided by your responses. Where you ultimately end up is heavily dependent on how you play the hands you’ve been dealt.

2. The way things once were.

You’re not the same person you were a year ago, a month ago, or even a week ago. You’re always learning and growing, and life is always evolving. Even though you can’t control everything that happens, you can control your attitude about what happens. And in doing so, you will gradually master change rather than allowing it to master you. So be humble today. Be teachable. The world is bigger than your view of the world. There’s always room for a fresh idea or a next step. But first you must accept the fact that things may never go back to how they used to be, and that this ending is really a new beginning.

3. Old mistakes and errors in judgment.

Forgive yourself for the bad decisions you’ve made in the past, for the times you lacked understanding, for the choices that accidentally hurt others and yourself. Forgive yourself, for being young and reckless. These are all vital lessons. And what matters most right now is your willingness to grow from them.

4. The need to control everything.

Be selective with your energy today. If you can fix a problem, fix it. If you can’t, then accept it and change your thoughts about it. Whatever you do, don’t attempt to invest more energy than you have, tripping over something behind you or something that only exists inside your head. Truth be told, some of the most powerful moments in life happen when you find the courage to let go of what can’t be changed. Because when you are no longer able to change a situation, you are challenged to change yourself — to grow beyond the unchangeable. And that changes everything.

5. Fantasies of a perfect path, or time to begin.

Too often we waste our time waiting for a path to appear, but it never does. Because we forget that paths are made by walking, not waiting. And we forget that there’s absolutely nothing about our present circumstances that prevents us from making progress again, one tiny step at a time.

6. The desire for quick and easy results.

Everything gets a bit hard and uncomfortable when it’s time to change. That’s just a part of the growth process. Things will get better, one step at a time. And keep in mind that your effort is never wasted, even when it leads to disappointing results. For it always makes you stronger, more educated, and more experienced. So when the going gets tough, be patient and keep going. Just because you are struggling does not mean you are failing. Every great success requires some kind of worthy struggle to get there.

7. Self-doubt.

Every difficult life situation can be an excuse for hopelessness or an opportunity for growth, depending on what you choose to do with it in the present. And in the midst of particularly hard days when I feel that I can’t endure, I try to remind myself that my track record for getting through hard days is 100% so far. The same is true for YOU. We have what it takes! (Note: Angel and I discuss this further in the Adversity chapter of “1,000 Little Things Happy, Successful People Do Differently”.)

8. Daily relationships that make us feel less like ourselves.

Let others take you as you are, or not at all. Speak your truth even if your voice shakes. By being yourself you put something beautiful into the world that was not there before. And in the long run it’s wiser to lose someone over being who you are, than it is to keep them by being someone you’re not. Because it’s easier to fill an empty space in your life where someone else used to be, than it is to fill the empty space inside yourself where YOU used to be.

9. Old life chapters that are still lingering half-open.

You’re going to mingle with a lot of people in your lifetime. You’re going to have first kisses you feel all the way down to your toes and think “Oh my gosh, I love him,” but really you just loved the kiss. You’re going to meet a friend you think you will know forever, but then something will change and you two will go your separate ways. You’re going to explore different parts of your life with different people who aren’t in it for the long haul, and that isn’t a bad thing. Life is a series of stories, and the way our stories intersect is remarkable. Sometimes people are in our lives for the whole story. Sometimes they are just a short chapter or two. It takes a brave person to know when that chapter is over, and then to turn the page. Be brave! Embrace your goodbyes, because almost every “goodbye” you receive in life sets you up for the next “hello.”

10. The belief that we always need more than we have.

We don’t always need more — we need appreciation. Because we often take for granted the very things that most deserve our attention and gratitude. How often do you pause to appreciate your life just the way it is? Look around right now, and be thankful… for your health, your family, your work, your comforts, your home. Nothing lasts forever. (Note: “The Good Morning Journal: Powerful Prompts & Reflections to Start Every Day” is a great tool for this kind of perspective shift.)

How to practice letting go if life tests you today.

Reflecting on the reminders above can be incredibly grounding, but what can you actively do to let go when the immediate tension inside you is spiraling?

Here’s a brief outline of some initial steps Angel and I personally take (and often recommend to our coaching clients and event attendees) to cope with the immediate tension that arises from disappointing outcomes in our lives:

• Acknowledge the tension inside you. — If you notice yourself getting angry and flustered, it’s a sign that you need to pause, take a deep breath, and practice the remaining steps.
• Resist the urge to act in haste. — The greatest harm comes whenever you act out of anger — actions that might include giving up too soon, consuming unhealthy substances, or even attacking someone else. So whenever you notice anger building up inside you, try not to take any form of destructive action. Instead, turn inward and mindfully assess whatever it is that’s arising.
• Sit with your feelings, and give them space. — Turn directly towards the tension you feel, and just be a witness. See it as something that’s passing through you, but is NOT YOU. It’s a feeling, a dark cloud passing across a vast sky, not a permanent fixture. Treat it that way. Instead of obsessing yourself with the dark cloud’s presence, try to broaden your perspective — give it the space it needs to pass. Sometimes you need a little distance to see things clearly again.
• Be OK with not knowing. — Now that you’ve given yourself some necessary space, tell yourself, “I don’t know why things are this way.” And be OK with this unknowing. Give yourself full permission to not have concrete answers in this moment. What would it be like to allow this moment to unfold without knowing? What is it like to not know what’s going on in the hearts and minds of others? What is it like to not know how to respond to life’s chaos? What is it like to be here right now, without jumping to conclusions?

The bottom line is that when life dishes you a harsh dose of reality, the best first steps involve sitting silently and witnessing the thoughts passing through you. Just witnessing at first, not interfering and not even judging, because by judging too rapidly you have lost the pure witness. The moment you rush to say, “this is absolutely terrible” or “things should be different,” you have already jumped head first into the chaos.

It takes practice to create a gap between the witnessing of thoughts and your response to them. Once the gap is there though, you are in for a great surprise — it becomes evident that you are not the thoughts themselves, nor the tension and chaos influencing them. You are the witness, a watcher, who’s capable of letting go, changing your mindset, and rising above the turmoil.

Now it’s your turn!

Yes it’s your turn to breathe deep, to be present, and to remind yourself that every day is a series of a million tiny miracles. So just do your best to see them today. See how inner peace comes with letting go of what you assume your journey is supposed to be like, and sincerely accepting it for everything that it is…

But before you go, please leave Angel and me a comment below and let us know what you think of this essay. Your feedback is important to us.

Which one of the points above resonated the most today?

Also, if you haven’t done so already, be sure to sign-up for our free newsletter to receive new articles like this in your inbox each week.

If somebody is working on themselves and changing for the better, it’s unnecessary to keep bringing up their past. People can change and grow. You know that’s true. But have you given yourself a fair chance to change and grow, too?

Have you loosened your grip on what’s behind you, so you can step forward again?

If you’re shaking your head, you aren’t alone. At times we all fall victim to our attachments. We simply don’t realize how often we block our own present blessings by holding on to everything so tightly.

Thus, it’s time for a quick true story about life and letting go…

When Our Old Stories Hold Us Back

She rarely makes eye contact. Instead, she looks down at the ground. Because the ground is safer. Because unlike people, it expects nothing in return. She doesn’t have to feel ashamed about her past. The ground just accepts her for who she is right now.

As she sits at the bar next to me, she stares down at her vodka tonic, and then the ground, and then her vodka tonic. “Most people don’t get me,” she says. “They ask me questions like, ‘What’s your problem?’ or ‘Were you beaten as a child?’ But I never respond. Because I don’t feel like explaining myself. And I don’t think they really care anyway.”

Just then, a young man sits down at the bar on the opposite side of her. He’s a little drunk and says, “You’re pretty. May I buy you a drink?” She stays silent and looks back down at the ground. After an awkward moment, he accepts the rejection, gets up, and walks away.

“Would you prefer that I leave too?” I ask. “No,” she says without glancing upward. “But I could use some fresh air. You don’t have to come, but you can if you want to.” I follow her outside and we sit on a street curb in front of the bar.

“Brrr… it’s a really chilly night!”

“Tell me about it,” she says while maintaining her usual downward gaze. The warm vapor from her breath cuts through the cold air and bounces off of the ground in front of her. “So why are you out here with me? I mean, wouldn’t you rather be inside in the warmth, talking to normal people about normal things?”

“I’m out here because I want to be. Because I’m not normal. And look, I can see my breath, and we’re in San Diego. That’s not normal either. Oh, and you’re wearing old Airwalk sneakers, and so am I — which may have been normal in 1994, but not anymore.”

She glances up at me and smirks, this time exhaling her breath upward into the moonlight. “I see you’re wearing a ring. You’re married, right?”

“Yeah,” I reply. “My wife, Angel, is just getting off work now and heading here to meet me for dinner.”

She nods her head and then looks back at the ground. “Well, you’re off the market… and safe, I guess. So can I tell you a story?”

“I’m listening.”

As she speaks, her emotional gaze shifts from the ground, to my eyes, to the moonlit sky, to the ground, and back to my eyes again. This rotation continues in a loop for the duration of her story. And every time her eyes meet mine she holds them there for a few seconds longer than she did on the previous rotation.

I don’t interject once. I listen to every word. And I assimilate the raw emotion present in the tone of her voice and in the depth of her eyes.

When she finishes, she says, “Well, now you know my story. You think I’m a freak, don’t you?”

“Place your right hand on your chest,” I tell her. She does. “Do you feel something?” I ask.

“Yeah, I feel my heartbeat.”

“Now close your eyes, place both your hands on your face, and move them around slowly.” She does. “What do you feel now?” I ask.

“Well, I feel my eyes, my nose, my mouth… I feel my face.”

“That’s right,” I reply. “But unlike you, stories don’t have heartbeats, and they don’t have faces. Because stories are not alive — they’re not people. They’re just stories.”

She stares into my eyes for a prolonged moment, smiles sincerely and says, “Just stories we live through.”

“Yeah… And stories we learn from.”

The Hard Lessons We Learn by Letting Go

The woman from the story above became one of our very first students when Angel and I opened the doors to the original version of the Getting Back to Happy course a decade ago, and she’s now a friend of ours too. She has learned and applied many remarkable lessons over the years that ultimately allowed her to let go of her difficult past — her story — and move forward with her life. And last night I sat down with her over a cup of tea and had an in-depth, soul-centered conversation about what she has learned over the years. I’m sharing her story and lessons with you today, with permission, because I know we all struggle in similar ways…

Here are four hard, actionable lessons we discussed:

1. You can have a heartbreaking story from the past without letting it dominate your present life.

In the present moment we all have some kind of pain: anger, sadness, frustration, disappointment, regret, etc.

Notice this pain within yourself, watch it closely, and see that it’s caused by whatever story you have in your head about what happened in the past (either in the recent past or in the distant past). Your mind might insist that the pain you feel is caused by what happened (not by the story in your head about it), but what happened in the past is NOT happening right now. It’s over. It has passed. But the pain is still happening right now because of the story you’ve been subconsciously telling yourself about that past incident.

Note that “story” does not mean “fake story.” It also does not mean “true story.” The word “story” in the context of your self-evaluation doesn’t have to imply true or false, positive or negative, or any other kind of forceful judgment call. It’s simply a process that’s happening inside your head:

• You are remembering something that happened.
• You subconsciously perceive yourself as a victim of this incident.
• Your memory of what happened causes a strong emotion in you.

So just notice what story you have, without judging it, and without judging yourself. It’s natural to have a story; we all have stories. See yours for what it is. And see that it’s causing you pain. Then take a deep breath, and another…

Inner peace begins the moment you take these deep breaths and choose not to allow the past to dominate your present thoughts and emotions. (Note: Angel and I discuss this process in more detail in the “Happiness” chapter of “1,000 Little Things Happy, Successful People Do Differently” and throughout the guided journal, “The Good Morning Journal: Powerful Prompts & Reflections to Start Every Day”.)

2. A big part of letting go is simply realizing there’s nothing to hold on to in the first place.

All of the things from our past that we desperately try to hold on to, as if they’re real, solid, everlasting fixtures in our lives, aren’t really there. Or if they are there in some form, they’re changing, fluid, impermanent, or simply imagined storylines in our minds.

Life gets a lot easier to deal with the moment we understand this.

Imagine you’re blindfolded and treading water in the center of a large swimming pool, and you’re struggling desperately to grab the edge of the pool that you think is nearby, but really it’s not—it’s far away. Trying to grab that imaginary edge is stressing you out, and tiring you out, as you splash around aimlessly trying to holding on to something that isn’t there.

Now imagine you pause, take a deep breath, and realize that there’s nothing nearby to hold on to. Just water around you. You can continue to struggle with grabbing at something that doesn’t exist… or you can accept that there’s only water around you, and relax, and float.

Today I challenge you to ask yourself:

• What’s something from the past that you are still desperately trying to hold on to?
• How is it affecting you in the present?

Then imagine the thing you’re trying to hold on to doesn’t really exist. Envision yourself letting go… and just floating.

How might that change your life from this moment forward?

3. The subtle pain you continue to feel can be healed through compassion for those suffering alongside you.

When we’re still working through a painful experience from the past, it’s easy to feel like we’re going through it alone — like no one else could possibly understand how we feel. In a way, we subconsciously place ourselves at the center of the universe, and see everything that happened exclusively from the viewpoint of how it affects us personally, without regard for anyone else. But as we grow through our pain and gradually broaden our horizons, we begin to see that our self-centered thinking is only fueling our misery. And we realize that shifting our focus onto others for a while can help.

It’s one of life’s great paradoxes: when we serve others, we end up benefiting as much if not more than those we serve. So whenever you feel pain from the past trying to suck you back in, shift your focus from your circumstances to the circumstances of those near and far.

The simplest way of doing this at any given moment?

Practice letting your breath be an anchor for global healing. Breathe in whatever painful feeling you’re feeling, and breathe out relief from that pain for everyone in the world who is suffering alongside you. For example:

• If you’re feeling grief, breathe in all the grief of the world… then breathe out peace.
• If you’re feeling anger, breathe in all the anger of the world… then breathe out forgiveness.
• If you’re feeling regretful, breathe in all the regret of the world… then breathe out gratitude for the good times.

Do this for a minute or two as often as you need to, imagining all the pain of those near and far coming in with each breath, and then a feeling of compassion and reconciliation radiating out to all of those who are in pain as you breathe out. Instead of running from your past and the pain it caused you, you’re embracing it… you’re letting yourself absorb it. And you’re thinking of others as well, which gets you out of that miserable, self-centered mindset trap.

4. There is always, always, always something to be grateful for.

Even when your past — your story — tries to pull you back in, you can consciously do your best to focus on your present blessings. What do you see in your life right now? Be thankful for the good parts. For your health, your family, your friends, or your home. Many people don’t have these things.

Remind yourself that the richest human is rarely the one who has the most, but the one who needs less. Wealth is a daily mindset. Want less and appreciate more today. Easier said than done of course, but with practice gratitude does get easier. And as you practice, you transform your past struggles into present moments of freedom.

Ultimately, on the average day, happiness is letting go of what you assume your life is supposed to be like right now and sincerely appreciating it for everything that it is. So at the end of this day, before you close your eyes, be at peace with where you’ve been and grateful for what you have right now. Life has goodness.

Now it’s your turn…

Again, the lessons above take practice to fully grasp in real time. So just do your best to bring awareness to this gradually — to practice — so you can let go one day at a time. Keep reminding yourself…

• You are not your bad days
• You are not your mistakes
• You are not your scars
• You are not your past

Be here now and breathe.

And before you go, please leave Angel and me a comment below and let us know what you think of this essay. Your feedback is important to us.

Also, if you haven’t done so already, be sure to sign-up for our free newsletter to receive new articles like this in your inbox each week.

Asking the right questions is the answer.

In a recent email newsletter I wrote, “Calm your mind today. Don’t just think outside the box; think like there is no box.”

And to my surprise, 97 people quoted that line and responded with the same general question: “How?”

I’ve spent the morning thinking about how to answer their collective question in the most universal way possible, and I’ve decided that the simplest explanation I can give is this: Ask yourself better questions — questions that focus your thoughts and filter out the excess noise that’s been cluttering your mind.

The calming and healing power of a positive imagination is unleashed by constraining your focus. Constraints drive creativity and force mindful thinking. It may sound counterintuitive at first but, in a backwards way, you break out of the box by stepping into the right shackles.

And that’s exactly what the questions below can help you with — shackling the noise in your head by channeling your focus into meaningful thoughts and moments of self-refection. Let these questions shift your perspective and guide you forward…

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Please share the questions above with others who you think will benefit from them. And as always, please share your thoughts with Marc and me in the comments section below. If you’re up to it, we would love to read your response to the very first question:  In one sentence, who are you?

(Also note that many of these photo-illustrated questions were initially created for our sister site, Thought Questions, but since we rarely update that site anymore we decided to share the questions with you here. Finally, many of these questions have also been published in the guided journal, “The Good Morning Journal”.)
For photo credits please refer to ThoughtQuestions.com

There I was, eating cereal and watching a CNN documentary about Kobe Bryant—yes, I mix deep life reflection with Raisin Bran—when his old speech teacher said something that made me pause mid-chew. He described Kobe’s approach to life as giving everything—heart, soul, and body—to his craft. No halfway. Just all in.

I sat there thinking, “Yes! That’s it!” That’s the very thing I try to convey to my students in class, usually while making wild arm gestures and accidentally knocking over a marker cup. I believe in that philosophy with every fiber of my chalk-dusted being.

High Risk, Deep Roots

But here’s the deal: it’s also terrifying.

This idea of going all in on your calling—it sounds noble and exciting and worthy of a motivational poster—but the truth is, it’s a gamble. A high-stakes, heart-first kind of gamble. Especially today.

I mean, the ancient world totally backed this idea. Aristotle called it arete—excellence as a way of life. The Stoics preached about inner strength, Japanese samurai gave us Bushidō, and every jazz musician who ever improvised their way to bliss knows the power of flow. Even athletes talk about that magical zone where time melts away and it’s just you, the court, the ball, and that buzzing sense of rightness.

Modern Metrics vs. Timeless Passion

But our modern world? Eh, not so much. Today, we value your output. Your metrics. Your monetization plan. It’s like we collectively replaced passion with performance indicators.

Don’t get me wrong—I’m not against paying the bills. I enjoy food, shelter, and the occasional streaming service. But if you’re a young person with a dream that doesn’t come with a subscription model or an app-based hustle plan? Welcome to what I call “existential whiplash.”

You’re told, “Follow your bliss!” and “Live with purpose!” But the next second someone’s asking, “Yeah, but how will you monetize that?”

This contradiction is exhausting. And it gets inside your head. You start to think, “Maybe I’m wrong to want this. Maybe I should just do something safer. Maybe dreams are for people with trust funds.”

But here’s where I get a little loud in class—yes, I stand on chairs occasionally—and say: No. Your dream is not a liability.

It’s a pulse. A heartbeat. A spark. And you owe it to yourself to explore it—even if it’s hard.

Now, I won’t sugarcoat this: you can throw your whole self into something and not get the rewards you hoped for. I’ve lived that. I’ve made documentaries that reached small audiences. I’ve written things I thought would change the world and heard nothing but crickets. I’ve built programs that vanished when the grant money dried up.

But here’s the weird thing: I still wouldn’t trade it. Because in the pursuit—yes, even in the flops—I found something essential.

The Gift of Flow and Presence

Flow. Purpose. Connection.

When I was filming at dawn in a mountain village in the Philippines, or listening—really listening—to a student struggle their way into their voice, I wasn’t thinking about success. I was there. Fully. Mindfully. There’s nothing else like it.

Those moments are why we do the risky thing. Because we’re not robots. We’re not spreadsheets. We’re meaning-makers. And when we pursue something with full attention and intention, we tap into something sacred.

Still, let’s be real. In our society, even mindfulness has been commodified. There’s a subscription for calm. A brand for stillness. A market for minimalism. If I sound cynical, it’s because I’ve watched so many of my students get talked out of their deepest truths by the crushing logic of “practicality.”

Redefining Success

So, what do we do? How do we hold on to our inner compass when the GPS keeps yelling “Recalculate!” toward a safer, more profitable life?

I think it comes down to redefining what “success” really means.

I tell my students: don’t measure your life by likes, views, or even income (although, yes, make sure you eat). Measure it by the depth of your experience. By the risks you were willing to take. By the people you helped. By the moments you felt alive and grounded in something real.

A Quiet Life Can Still Be Epic

Because that’s what makes a life worth living. Not perfection. Not applause. But presence.

You can live a small-looking life with a vast inner world. You can chase something meaningful and not be famous. You can teach or paint or write or code or dance or build without needing to “go viral” to matter.

Yes, there are trade-offs. Believe me, I’ve wrestled with them. I’ve had months where I wondered if I made a mistake, if I’d be better off in a more stable career. I’ve asked myself whether it’s selfish to keep chasing ideas when I could be saving for retirement instead.

But then I remember: a life without dreams, without creative risk, without vulnerability? That would break me faster than any unpaid invoice.

This Is the Gift (and the Gamble)

To the dreamers reading this—especially the young ones, or the older ones just beginning again—I want to say this:

Don’t let the world’s cynicism shrink your vision. Stay mindful, not just in meditation, but in how you choose—how you spend your time, your energy, your attention. Live with full awareness, even when it’s hard. Especially when it’s hard.

Because that’s the gift of mindful living. Not constant calm or peace—but full contact with reality. The beauty and the fear. The creativity and the chaos. The risk and the reward.

Show Up Anyway

And maybe, just maybe, that’s the point. That life isn’t about winning. It’s about showing up fully, heart, soul, and body. Just like Kobe. Just like all of us trying to do this thing with courage.

I’m not indispensable. I’m not a guru. I’m just a guy who still gets goosebumps when a student discovers something real inside themselves. I’ve lived long enough to know dreams don’t always pay off, but they always teach you something vital—about who you are and what you care about.

And for me, that has always been enough.

I don’t know about you, but I have to be careful during the holidays to avoid the pressure to uphold expectations of idyllic holiday experiences for my various family members.

I love baking and listening to Christmas music, and have always associated the holidays with a sense of warm connection to family and friends.

But there are so many things to do! Gifts to buy and wrap, school parties to plan, cookies to bake, cards to write (I don’t even do these anymore), not to mention the house to decorate and all the other holiday trappings.

As with any time of stress, our relationships can take a hit. We may disagree with our partners about which family to spend time with, or what gifts to get the kids. We may have different ideas about what makes a nice holiday.

Or we just simply forget to be loving towards our partners because we’re too busy rushing around.

To alleviate holiday relationship stress this year, take a moment to check in with yourself and set your intention to create a conscious holiday experience that takes into account your vision AND your limitations, as well as honors your relationship as the foundation for a peaceful experience.

Holiday Relationship Stress: How to Create a Peaceful, Connected Holiday Season

Here are the top 4 reasons the holidays can be so hard, and some trusted antidotes to these challenges.

Expectation that things should be a certain way. So often we have an image in our mind of how things should be, and beat ourselves up when it isn’t just so. This could range from expecting a perfect family gathering even when there is unresolved pain and drama, to worrying about the holiday card.

• Decide to let go of attachment to any particular outcome. Enjoy the “input,” or the process. Love the moments, appreciate what is real. Are you arguing about how to hang the lights? Laugh about it. Appreciate how much your partner cares about the lights. This will soften conflict instantly.
• Release any visions that you feel OBLIGATED to but don’t feel in alignment with. Remember it’s a choice. Maybe you want to lay off shopping and make cards instead.
• Be present with your partner. This is the greatest gift you can give during crazy times. Just be available with your attention and stillness to experience moments of just being together.

Conflicting ideas about what you should be doing. Do you have different opinions on how to spend the holidays? Do you disagree on what gifts to get kids or which family to see? Here are two steps you can take to find the common ground:

• Share what you want for the holidays – not what you don’t want. Be honest about your dislikes and fears, but try to put things in terms of your ideal. What do you envision for you and your family?
• Create a shared vision. After sharing your individual wishes, see where your visions overlap. What can you both agree on?  Create a plan from there.  Are there things you can let go of? Let them go without resentment as a conscious choice for peace.

Rushing around trying to get it all done.There are last minute errands, gift shopping, and events to attend on top of regular life. This is a time to turn toward each other for support.

• Nurture each other. Does your partner need a night out with friends? Do you want a foot massage? Think deeply about what helps you each thrive in times of stress.  Not sure? Ask.
• Stay connected to your family and friends. Yes I know lunch may be out of the question, but even just a phone call or email can help you feel supported. Feeling part of a wider community – especially as you navigate the minutiae of your life – is key to balance.
• Be gentle with yourself. Take moments to just breathe a few times and notice your body. Scan for tension and let it go.
• Positive self-talk only! Notice what you hear yourself saying, and give yourself a “zero negativity” policy. Strictly enforcing this during the holidays will help you feel supported and relaxed, not stressed.

Grieving the loss of a loved one. There is nothing like the holidays to bring out the pain of celebrating in our lost loved ones’ absence. Be gentle with yourself and allow the space for grief to move through you, so that you can also be present for the joyful (if bittersweet) moments.

• Reach out for support with friends. Sometimes we forget to talk about the things that are hard. But honoring your experience and giving it space to come out with support is a gift to yourself. You deserve it, and people want to help you.
• Take time to feel all feelings. Staying present to emotions in the body allows them to change and move through you.
• Join a bereavement support group. If this is an especially devastating time for you, it can be so helpful to join a support group. It is invaluable to find others who can relate to your experiences, and sometimes we need people outside our regular circle of friends and family.

Stresses aside, the holidays can be an opportunity to consciously create new traditions, foster genuine connection, and love your family.

As long as we take care of our closest relationships, we build a foundation for joy and gratitude to fill this time of year.

“Being free isn’t actually that easy.” ~Unknown

I’ve always been an achiever. I’ve worked hard to reach goals: I was good at school, then got a good job, and ended up making good money. My colleagues valued my clear view of the goal, my ability to break down the big task into parts that one can work on, casting it all as individual problems that one can solve. I was diligent, hard-working, and reliable. An employer’s dream employee.

At the same time, I’ve always had a wish to be “free.” Not so much from outer constraints, but from inner ones—depressive episodes, difficult feelings, painful experiences. It sounds terribly naive when you put it like that, but I guess it was a wish to live “happily ever after” at some point in the future.

And I was willing to work hard to achieve that, too.

In hindsight, it all seems clear how that was bound to fail. But working hard was the one thing I knew how to do, so I applied it to everything, including the wish for happiness, the wish for inner freedom.

I tried a range of different things and ended up connecting with Buddhism. I think what appealed to me was the clear outline of a path to achieving happiness, the methods, and the way the goal was described: enlightenment, awakening, the ultimate inner freedom. So I learned about the methods and began applying myself to them.

With my scattered mind, I sat down trying to watch my breath. With aching knees, I sat for hours repeating mantras, counting how many repetitions I “got in,” making progress toward the numeric goal of 100,000 repetitions of various things. That took years.

I think my wife noticed long before me that there was something unhealthy in my approach. She pointed out how I came down the stairs with a “forced smile” after a long meditation session. She tried to encourage me to “live.” It was no good; I wouldn’t listen.

The harder I tried to work at it, the more frustrated I became. Since I didn’t see the progress I craved— like peace of mind, like mental calm—I thought the solution was clear: I had to try harder. Devote more time to it, reduce other activities more. Retracting from the world, rather than living in it, my wife called it.

The big irony was that, in order to feel more alive, I cut myself off from life more and more. I tried to achieve inner freedom by applying the same habitual patterns that governed my life: striving hard, unrelentingly.

I once saw a postcard with the drawing of a parrot walking out of its birdcage, while wearing a small birdcage like a helmet around its head. The words on the card said, “Being free isn’t actually that easy.” I think it summarizes very well how I was trapped trying to be free.

When my tenacious striving ended up threatening my marriage, I sought help from a therapist, and that’s when things started to change.

I became aware of the pattern I was caught in. The narrow-mindedness of feeling that I had to achieve something big. The unspoken wish that one day, someone would tap me on the shoulder and say, “Well done.” The rejection of life in the name of an abstract goal—ironically, in my case, the goal of wanting to be truly alive.

I can’t say change happened overnight, although there was this one therapy session where I had a sense that I could feel that inner truth of just being, of awareness. That felt real and true—and much more than any external rules and descriptions of a path, it has been my compass, my guiding light ever since.

What amazes me most is that for so many years, I just didn’t see the obvious: that I was applying my habitual patterns of ambition and goal-oriented striving to meditation, to the search for inner freedom. How on earth did I not see that?

Frankly, I think it’s like with the fish and the water. The joke of the old fish meeting two young fish and asking them, “How’s the water today?” and the young fish responding, “What do you mean, water?” It’s so around you, so much an integral part of your lived experience, that you don’t even notice.

After that recognition, I think the process has been gradual, and I would say it’s ongoing. The key thing is that I recognize striving as striving now. I’m in touch with the emotional tone that comes with it and have gradually learned to take it as a warning sign. Whenever I feel the narrowness of wanting to achieve, I now pause to check if I’m just digging myself into a hole again.

As a result, there is now a sense of acceptance, of acknowledging that some things cannot be achieved by willpower. That feeling alive isn’t really something you can work at. In fact, today I’d say it’s the opposite: the way to feel alive is to relax into the reality of the moment, again and again. It’s admitting to myself what’s really there, in every situation, pleasant and unpleasant. It’s breathing with the pain, cherishing the pleasant moments. Valuing the people in my life.

In short, I’ve given up on the “big goals.” I still meditate every day, but I do it differently now: I always try to work with what’s really there in that particular moment—sitting quietly with the breath on some days, working with emotions on others, maybe formulating wishes for well-being on the third day… There are so many options, and the key to making it a living practice, for me, has been to allow myself to start with what’s really there, every day anew.

If any of this rings a bell, if you feel stuck trying to live a meaningful life, here are the lessons I’m drawing from my experience.

1. Choose a direction, not a destination.

To me, owning my life is a cornerstone. Grabbing the steering wheel, deciding on my own priorities rather than simply living according to a script that’s provided from the outside. So I totally stand by that original aim of wanting to live with inner freedom.

In fact, if you don’t already have a clear sense of what you want your life to be, I strongly recommend taking some time to explore that question for yourself. There are great methods for this—reflective prompts or journal exercises that help you envision your ideal future.

I’ve realized that what matters most is the direction I’m giving to my life—not so much a specific outcome, let alone a timeline for achieving it. Attainable goals have their place with respect to the outside world, such as working toward an education or a place to live, but with respect to inner processes, I’m now convinced that you cannot force things. At the same time, my orientation in the present situation matters deeply and makes all the difference.

2. Be patient and gentle with yourself.

This is the hard part for an achiever like me. My habitual disposition is wanting to measure progress. So after I realized the dead end I had maneuvered myself into with that goal-oriented approach to meditation, it’s been an ongoing challenge. The creature of habit in me continues to want to “be good at it,” to achieve.

The process has been, and continues to be, getting to know that driven feeling and learning to actively soften it whenever I notice it. One helpful practice has been tuning into the tone of my inner voice—the one reminding me to let go of goals and relax. How friendly or harsh does it sound? And if it’s rather impatient, can I soften that too?

Suddenly, rather than chasing some goal, I’m exploring what’s really there in myself, discovering and cultivating a friendly stance every day anew.

3. Connect with your inner compass.

I’m a rational person, and I often insist on spelling out the reasons for a decision. As far as things go in the world out there, I think that’s useful, even though I tend to overdo it sometimes.

At the same time, I believe that I have an “inner compass,” which I discovered during my therapy sessions and that I find difficult to put into words. It’s a sense of whether something feels right that I can somehow feel in my body.

I value this sense as extremely precious, even though I cannot describe it well. This inner compass is the most important guiding principle for me regarding “inner” topics, which cannot always be explained through logic or reason. It’s about whether something feels healthy, whether it seems to move you in the right direction.

Tuning into this compass, even when I can’t explain it, helps me stay true to myself, no matter what situation I’m in.

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To me, the result of applying these principles has been great. I guess I won’t be enlightened any time soon, but the good thing is, I’m much happier with that now than I’ve ever been in my life.

Defining Mindfulness & Historical Roots

At its core, mindfulness is the practice of being fully present and engaged in the moment, free from distractions or judgment.

• Originated over 2,500 years ago (Buddhist teachings).
• Traditionally linked to meditation practices.
• Modern adaptations focus on psychological well-being.

Modern Interpretation & Practices

Mindfulness is now a practical tool for improving everyday life and mental health.

• Breathing exercises & daily integration.
• Mindfulness-Based Stress Reduction (MBSR).
• Accessible to everyone, regardless of background.

Impact on Life and Well-Being

Mindfulness offers profound benefits, enhancing overall well-being.

• Improved Mental Health (reduced anxiety/depression).
• Enhanced Emotional Regulation.
• Increased Focus and Clarity.
• Stronger Relationships.

Future Directions in Mindfulness

The field of mindfulness continues to evolve with new research and applications.

• AI Integration for personalized practices.
• Nature-Based Practices.
• Enhanced Emotional Intelligence.
• Community Mindfulness programs.